Do you know that “Theory as theory, but practice kills us!” Well, this article still had to wait for that: 1. articles like this were written and 2. I didn’t know where to start and what to end with.
So, I said to start with this very thought, because this is the end. About “practice”.
Before Arya I had theories about how I would be as a mother. With Arya in the tummy, theories have changed, but we still keep some of the old concepts. With Arya in his arms, all theories have undergone major changes! :))
So, my dear future life-givers, prepare for change. Accept it without being opposed, because otherwise everything for you will be the hardest.
As I said, before Arya said that I will not let the child change me, change my habits and lifestyle, I strongly believe that I will be the mother who will manage to do this and dismantle the myth. I laughed in the nose at those who told me how their children changed their lives and I was even ironic or a little critical in myself. Then, hearing more and more experiences began to sprout in my mind the idea that I am not ready for such a change, that I am not yet ready to give up my weekends of laziness, my time for myself, etc.
But one day in October, the change began to take over within me without seeking permission from the obsessed control in me and regardless of whether I was ready or not! ๐ Now I sit and think that even during the 8 months I didn’t do too well. I read a lot of articles on all topics related to breastfeeding, I had already formed a few concepts and thought I would know how to manage every moment. But … you know … theory, practice, what I said at the beginning …
In the hospital it was relatively easy because Stefan was with me for the duration of the “event” he attended the birth, we slept together in the living room, we kept our chicken at the breast and everything was very easy. Plus the help of the nurses who were always with us, but the most important thing was that we attended the courses for the future parents together. The long-awaited day came too – the one when we finally left home. I thanked God, because even though she was born at 35 weeks, she was not required to stay in the incubator and her breast was accepted immediately after being given to me. I confess with my hand on my heart that when I was alone with her at home I felt overwhelmed. I had forgotten everything I thought I knew and I felt extremely helpless, helpless. Where the hell was I, that informed, who knew what to do? I must admit that I needed a little help to gather. The first week I thought it was a horror movie and I couldn’t believe I was trapped in the skin of the main character. Weeks went by, they became months, and with each stage I dismantled a theory.
Here I wanted to get there (long introduction, right ?!). Before / after. Let’s tell you ...
Before, imbued with American films in which the child has his room, and the parents on theirs, I was also seen standing relaxed in a room, doing my job, and the child in his room, “communicating” his needs through the device. that stays in each of the rooms. Good. With Arya in the carrier I set out to share the same room in different beds. You know, together, but keep some distance. After Arya, the crib was used for about a week. Then came the colic, she would calm down if I was holding her by my tummy and she would wake up crying when I put her in her crib. So I told myself that after the colic’s gone, I’ll move her back to her bed. In the meantime, I read about the benefits of co-sleeping for the child’s emotional development and even if I didn’t read about them, I wouldn’t be able to sleep away from it (yes, in the crib it’s far!).
After 8 months of sleeping “in me” all I can offer her now is “near me”.
I didn’t even want to hear about breastfeeding before. I was watching with horror at my mother’s left breasts, which she was always joking about, saying they were “my works”. I said no, that’s not for me. I do not want breasts left and a child dependent on me. During pregnancy, I set myself the goal of breastfeeding for up to a year or even more if I can, being more informed about how important and healthy the baby’s breast milk is and how absolutely no formula, no matter how improved it would be, it cannot equal it. I wished with all my heart that I could breastfeed. After the birth, the breastfeeding chapter seemed to me the most difficult in its beginnings, but it became the most natural thing possible. Yes, the breasts have already started to leave and although sometimes I felt weird when I saw them in the mirror, when Arya the Pope felt that I could do this until the end of the world without any regret. So here my theory has changed. I’ll breastfeed until Arya tells you to stop. Yes, it’s dependent on me. So what! When she becomes independent, I will probably long for this addiction. It is a sublime act and no woman should avoid it “because …”.
Time for me. Here is the thing I was most afraid of and I wasn’t ready to lose. In the first month the 5 minute shower and the 10 bath were my only time for me. After spending 9 months in you, you can’t set it aside at once. And if you have to leave it for a few hours he will still want you. My mother’s arms are no substitute for anyone. Outings with friends have also changed their dynamics and frequency. However, we take Arya everywhere she can go with the baby, but it is not the same anymore. Ultimately it doesn’t have to be. From now on you are a person with other responsibilities. But even so you should not give up on yourself, on outings in the city, on social life. And this for your psychic and implicit gmo-shock. I am set to leave in about 5 minutes now. You can be an arranged mother, flirtatious, beautiful and with a small child in her arms. For your self-esteem. To feel good in your skin even with a few extra pounds. Because you deserve.
And now, I stop because Arya woke up and it’s kind of hard to type with one hand … ๐ She is also “guilty” if the text has a mistake, because I have no time to read / correct it.
I hug you and look forward to your own experiences. I want to see how many moms / bellies I have around here. ๐
Arya demands her rights!
See you! ๐
11 thoughts to “The life after giving birth”
I precisely needed to thank you very much once again. I do not know the things I might have taken care of without the secrets shared by you directly on this theme. It truly was a real horrifying setting in my opinion, but being able to see a specialized fashion you managed that made me to jump over contentment. Now i am grateful for the work and as well , sincerely hope you comprehend what a powerful job you are undertaking instructing other individuals via your web page. I know that you’ve never met all of us.
Thanks a lot for providing individuals with remarkably brilliant possiblity to read in detail from here. It is always very superb plus jam-packed with a good time for me and my office colleagues to search your blog minimum 3 times per week to find out the latest secrets you have got. And lastly, I’m also at all times contented with your remarkable thoughts served by you. Some 3 tips in this post are truly the most impressive we’ve ever had.
Thanks so much for providing individuals with such a pleasant opportunity to read articles and blog posts from here. It really is very lovely and full of a good time for me and my office fellow workers to visit the blog the equivalent of three times weekly to see the latest issues you have. And of course, I am actually happy with all the impressive thoughts you give. Certain 1 facts in this posting are unquestionably the most effective we have all ever had.
I have to get across my passion for your generosity giving support to those who really want help with this important concern. Your personal dedication to getting the solution all over was amazingly helpful and has empowered ladies much like me to get to their ambitions. The interesting tutorial indicates a whole lot a person like me and further more to my colleagues. Regards; from each one of us.
You made some respectable points there. I appeared on the internet for the problem and found most individuals will associate with with your website.
A lot of thanks for your whole hard work on this web page. Kate enjoys conducting internet research and it is easy to see why. Most of us learn all of the lively manner you produce effective secrets by means of this web blog and foster participation from people on this area then my girl has always been discovering a great deal. Enjoy the rest of the year. You are always conducting a very good job.
Needed to post you this little bit of remark just to thank you again for the wonderful thoughts you have documented on this page. It is certainly wonderfully open-handed with you to make freely all that a lot of people would’ve sold for an ebook to make some cash for themselves, notably considering that you could possibly have tried it if you ever wanted. The inspiring ideas as well served to be a easy way to know that other individuals have similar interest like my own to learn a good deal more on the topic of this condition. Certainly there are many more pleasurable instances in the future for those who browse through your blog post.
A lot of thanks for your own labor on this blog. Kate take interest in participating in internet research and it’s simple to grasp why. A lot of people hear all about the dynamic manner you create good thoughts via your blog and as well as strongly encourage response from other individuals on the matter so our favorite girl has always been understanding a lot of things. Take pleasure in the rest of the year. You’re the one carrying out a really great job.
I together with my buddies ended up reading through the great ideas on your web page then all of the sudden I had a terrible feeling I never expressed respect to the site owner for those techniques. All the young men became so very interested to see them and already have very much been tapping into these things. I appreciate you for indeed being quite thoughtful and for figuring out such beneficial guides millions of individuals are really eager to discover. Our own sincere regret for not expressing gratitude to sooner.
Thank you for all your valuable effort on this site. Kim really loves setting aside time for research and it is easy to see why. My partner and i hear all concerning the compelling manner you convey reliable ideas on this web site and even invigorate contribution from other individuals on the subject matter plus our princess is now discovering a great deal. Take advantage of the remaining portion of the year. Your performing a powerful job.
I discovered your blog web site on google and test a couple of of your early posts. Continue to maintain up the excellent operate. I simply further up your RSS feed to my MSN News Reader. Looking for ahead to studying more from you afterward!?